Give me cha cha heels

The legendary Eartha Kitt singing with Bronski Beat, “Cha Cha Heels”, 1989. As only Eartha could do it.

truly disgusting food video

This is an actual employee training video from Wendy’s during the 1980s. Can you imagine eating one of those nasty, wet, square meat patties? I didn’t think so. There must have been plenty of snickering happening among the new hires.

Big-haired Latin girls

Miami Sound Machine, featuring Gloria Estefan singing “Conga”, 1985. Check out the big-haired girls at the concert, along with the oh-so-hideous 80s turquoise and mauve color scheme on the stage.

We also heard through the grapevine that Gloria Estefan is scheduled to portray Connie Francis in a bio film soon.

You’re twisted, sister

Twisted Sister singing “I Want to Rock”, 1985. I’m happy I had an education instead of becoming a twisted sister. Singer Dee Snider could use a makeover. Perhaps Mimi from the Drew Carey show could help him.

Made in America

Apparently, people didn’t listen to Bob Hope. So many years of buying shoddy merchandise from China and other countries has decimated our manufacturing base in the United States. Our economic situation would be much stronger today if we hadn’t destroyed our own workforce.

This television commercial dates to 1986.

I am a man / I need a man

Amanda Lear in 1986 singing “I Need a Man”. Some say she once was a man. Some believe she is a natural-born woman. In any event, 1986 is too late to be playing disco diva, and she does look suspiciously like Loni Anderson with breast reduction.

Huxtable the Huckster

Here is a cloyingly annoying television commercial for Jello Pudding, with Bill Cosby shilling unhealthy chemical-ridden slop to unsuspecting children. Yes, I realize we all ate this stuff as children, but as adults, I hope we protect our kids from this tripe. 1982

Hey Baby! Knead my loaf

I don’t know much about this video, but it is obviously British, and obviously from the 80s. So that’s how to stay healthy.

Nicolas Cage is not a Valley Girl

but he dated one in this throwaway little film from 1983, “Valley Girl”. It featured some great music, but who remembers the story?

Your toenails are so grody

Since I actually live in the Valley, and am headed to Ventura Boulevard in a few minutes I thought it fitting to celebrate Moon Unit Zappa singing “Valley Girl”, in 1982, on Solid Gold. This song spawned Valley Girl imitators from Tarzana to Tuckahoe.